Will & Way #143: Remove the friction
Plus, snow in Houston!
Hello from Houston, where it snowed like 4 inches yesterday!
Lydia woke up Friday with the flu, so all of our MLK weekend plans went out the window, and then her school got canceled Tuesday and Wednesday, so basically my productivity has been at nil and my to-do list is feeling neglected. But whatever, right, because look at that historic snowfall event we got to enjoy yesterday:
MAKE IT EASY, aka REMOVE THE FRICTION!
I keep seeing all of these job posts on LinkedIn. People create a post to let their network know they’re hiring, and they ask people to do something concrete (usually DM with a portfolio link, email with portfolio link, or comment with portfolio link).
The number of people who comment and say things like this is mind-boggling to me:
Hi, I’m interested! (with NO PORTFOLIO LINK)
Could you share more details/answer a question?
(For a potential client in the auto industry) As a world-class contractor, I’m DRIVEN and ready to STEER this project to success 🚀🚀
The third one doesn’t work because it’s just bad and AI-generated.
Here’s the reason why the other two probably won’t go anywhere: People are lazy!! They don’t want to take not ONE extra step to find the info they asked for, get in touch with you, or learn more about you. You could be the most bad-ass candidate in the WORLD and never hear back because you commented, “This is right up my alley!” instead of just giving them what they asked for.
A while back, someone — let’s call them Sam — emailed me to ask if I had any tips for freelance success. (I had six-figure years 2023 and 2024, and I should be on track to achieve that in 2025. I’m very grateful for it, as I know this economy has not been an easy one for many freelancers.)
Anyway, Sam said they were new to freelancing and feeling the struggle. I wrote back and offered a few tips, and one of them was that I’m extremely responsive to my clients during our engagements. (You probably know this if you know me IRL. I do not have unread messages!)
I totally understand having boundaries, and I’m not advocating for scrapping them entirely, but I’ve also found I have many repeat clients and referrals, and I think it’s in large part because I’m reliable + quick, and I respond promptly. We’ve already established people are lazy, but they’re also anxious when they’re trusting you to do something for a project. I know how that feels (I hate waiting days for a simple response), so I’d rather just keep the lines of communication flowing.
Sam wrote back and said the responsive thing was good to know; they’d been taking a couple of days to respond to client emails and were generally feeling disillusioned with the on-call expectations some people have for contractors (who aren’t paid to be on call).
Again, I understand boundaries, and I don’t think we should burn ourselves out for clients who don’t pay us to wait around for their next message. However, I DO think that if you’re serious about growing your business and getting people to work with you, you’ll seriously boost your chances of success by removing the friction of a two-day wait time to get back to folks.
Removing friction for potential clients looks like this:
Add your portfolio link to your email signature so it’s always right there. Passive marketing, 100% free.
And add your site to your LinkedIn URL/CTA, while you’re at it.
If you have a question about a job posting, try to find the answer in the JD or website first. If the answer doesn’t turn up, you can include it in your intro email, but I typically save questions until I’m in conversation with a potential client. Assume people are getting TONS of applications, so it doesn’t make sense to ask them for anything just yet.
Instead of commenting with a stock reply, do what they’re asking you to. If they want emails with your portfolio and rates, send them an email with your portfolio and rates.
If you have a newsletter or mailing list, remove double opt-in unless it’s legally necessary.
Of course, you can include other info you think is pertinent, but don’t DM someone if they’ve asked for an email. Don’t send an email and say, “Happy to share my portfolio if you’d like!” if they’ve already asked for one. You’re creating friction by forcing someone to take the time to email you BACK to get something they should have already received. You will probably lose them at that step and thus, lose the potential opportunity as well.
Removing friction for yourself looks like this:
Schedule/automate things whenever possible. I set up recurring reminders for my cat’s medications, friends I talk to on a monthly basis, a monthly game night I host, etc etc. Relying on myself to remember that the water filters need to get changed every X weeks is too much work. Give future you a break!
“Bundle” things together that you want to become a habit. I got an LED mask for my birthday, and I’ve been trying to find something I can bundle it with during my daily routine so it becomes a habit. I haven’t found the right thing yet, but this would look like: Brush teeth + mask OR make coffee + mask, etc. I need to tie it to something else that’s already second nature or the chances decrease that it will happen.
AND WHEN TO ADD FRICTION
One last thing about friction: It’s also helpful to add some to stop yourself from doing things you want to do or build better habits.
Solid example: I just deleted the homepage apps on my phone for Instagram, Gmail (!!), Facebook, and TikTok. Even though they’re technically still on my phone, I have to go search for them to open them.
Yeah…I’m not doing all that. Which means I haven’t been on my phone nearly as much, and that feels amazing, especially going into what I assume will be an absolute circus of a news cycle for the next long while. (On that note, here are some actions to take that are not protesting or voting related, if you’re interested.)
Will close with a great excerpt on moving away from social media:
but the weirdest thing to happen was my mood significantly shifted. I became more stable because I said goodbye to shit I did not need to hear or know or see. in other words, I controlled what I could in a world where I cannot control most things. you could say I went back in time to a simpler time that we all say has flown away but is still, unbelievably, here. and the scary thing about it all is that I didn’t even know social media was affecting me in such ways because it became so normal that I defended its presence in my life for the longest time. I somehow forgot it was created by a lonely man who never had anyone’s best intentions at heart.
RERUN: Looking for a community to join?
There are a number of new subscribers here, so I’m including this list again in case it’s helpful!
Elpha, a community for professional women, recently announced it was shutting down. They shared a roundup of other communities that I thought would be helpful to share here (with their permission).
Free communities
WNB.rb - a community for women and non-binary Ruby developers.
SheTO - a community built exclusively for women+ leaders in Engineering, IT, Project, and Program Management.
Maiden - a community that empowers women to confidently leverage AI in their existing careers through live, collaborative learning circles.
Women in Product Facebook Group - non-profit organization dedicated to providing women with equal access and representation in product management careers at all levels.
The Community Community - for senior community professionals.
Moms In Tech - a community to support women in tech through all stages of motherhood.
VC Backed Moms - for moms in the startup world.
Sista Circle - a solidarity group dedicated to supporting the work of black women in tech.
Rands - a leadership Slack with private community channels for women and nonbinary people in tech.
Girls Gone Wired - a subreddit where “girls get their geek on”.
SheCanCode - a collaborative community working together to tackle the tech gender gap.
Women Coders Network discord - when Women Who Code shut down, the community started this discord channel.
Seattle Women in Tech - a Meetup group for Seattle-based professional business women/non-binary folks and marginalized groups in tech.
Women in Tech - a Slack community for women in tech to chat and support each other. Invite-only, DM Angelique Weger for an invite.
Like Minded Collective - a community of female founders that puts friendship first and business second.
The Passionistas Project - an inclusive sisterhood where passion-driven women come to get support, find their purpose, and feel empowered to transform their lives and change the world.
Thrive-WiSE - a non-profit that works to support and retain women+ engineers and technologists through education, mentorship, and advocacy programs.
AnitaB.org - a global nonprofit organization that aims to recruit, retain, and advance women in technology.
Ellevate Network - a network for professional women+ with local chapters across the US & Canada.
Nasdaq Entrepreneurial Center's Milestone Circles - a dedicated space to learn alongside like-minded women business owners across America.
Women Techmakers - Google’s program for women in tech.
Paid communities
Women in AI - for connecting, empowering, and elevating founders, builders, and investors in the AI space.
Health Tech Nerds - for healthtech professionals (not women-specific but have done women-specific channels and virtual networking events via Slack and their matching initiatives).
StartUp Marketer - for a place to connect with fellow marketers.
Her Workplace - an AI-powered career network for women and non-binary leaders.
Substance - a global community for female creatives, entrepreneurs, and visionaries.
TheCLUB SV - a San Francisco Bay Area-based community dedicated to accelerating women leaders.
The Old Girls Club - a Slack community for non-male-identifying people building ambitious careers in male-dominated spaces.
Psst: Got a sec?
If you’ve got anything to share, I’d love to hear it. There’s a survey below just for you; I really appreciate it! Feedback helps me focus on the things you find valuable.
ROUNDUP:
Watched: Challengers (I had no idea what to expect going in and loved this movie!), Schitt’s Creek (finally finished), Conclave (A++++ for cinematography and Vatican City vibes!), and Gladiator (the first one; forgot how incredible this movie is. It has it all: political intrigue, trauma, grief, loyalty, vindication, and, yes, weird incest energy)
I read Is She Really Going Out With Him? by Sophie Cousens. Trying to get more into the rom-com genre because I’m working on a second fiction novel and thinking that’s the feel I’m going for 👀 I liked this one, which is pretty clean and features a newly divorced mom of 2 who starts letting her kids set her up on dates to protect her job as a columnist
This shift in how law firms are trying to prevent burnout is encouraging!
The controversy over the Walmart logo rebrand has been interesting to watch. (See here for an example lol) I know they’re basically the same in many ways, but I do think the new one has a fresher, more youthful feel.
Stay warm,
Nikki
How I cope with winter storm warnings: run to H-Mart, purchase enough ingredients to make bulgogi for 10 people, and start prepping. This is my most perfect lettuce wrap featuring rice, spicy bean sprouts, kimchi, bulgogi, and a homemade fermented soybean paste I made. SO GOOD!
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All of this advice is SO exceptional. Thank you!!